"The secret of eternal youth is arrested development."

"I have a simple philosophy. Fill what's empty. Empty what's full. And scratch where it itches."

"He looks as though he's been weaned on a pickle."

"If you can't say anything good about someone, sit right here by me."

"I have a simple philosophy. Fill what's empty. Empty what's full. Scratch where it itches."

"He appears to have been weened on a pickle."

"Desultory reading is delightful, but to be beneficial, our reading must be carefully directed."

"She did not talk to people as if they were strange hard shells she had to crack open to get inside. She talked as if she were already in the shell. In their very shell."

"And Charlie, don't forget about what happened to the man who suddenly got everything he ever wanted. He lived happily ever after."

"Life is a God-damned, stinking, treacherous game and nine hundred and ninety-nine men out of a thousand are bastards."

"Just goes to show you. You can kill a guy, fold him up, stuff him in your trunk, and still you don't *really* know him."

"Money is like muck, not good except it be spread."